Relaxation

This page helps you do "relaxation" as opposed to "meditation".

Relaxation

"Meditation" is done to grow spiritually. It has the side effect of improving mental wellness. "Relaxation" is done solely to improve your mental wellness (see below). Most people that meditate are actually doing it to improve their mental wellness. Relaxation is purely physiological. There are dozens of solid, scientific research papers that demonstrate relaxation works

It's simple and it works.

Your daily relaxation practice will:

1. Lower your blood pressure
2. Reduce anxiety
3. Improve mood (make you more optimistic, confident, calmer, assertive)
4. Reduce anger
5. Allow you to handle stress better
6. Improve your self control (less procrastination, better ability to think long term)
7. Improve your sleep

After several weeks of daily relaxation, even though your external situation hasn't changed, you will worry less, get angry less, be more optimistic and, in general cope better. And, you will usually fall asleep faster, wake less often during the night and require less sleep to be fully rested.

To establish a strong relaxation practice:

1. Do your relaxation practice in a warm, quiet, private room where you won't be disturbed. The room should be dim so that when your eyes are closed there isn't any light leaking through your closed eyelids. If you don't have access to a quiet, dim room, buy a set of earplugs and a sleep mask to cover your eyes.
2. Wear loose, warm comfortable clothing including socks (the illustration doesn't show this so you can see the body position clearly). If the floor is hardwood, you'll need some padding like a folded blanket.
3. Lie on the floor on your back with your arms out slightly from your sides, hands open and palms up and your legs slightly spread. If your arms and legs at not at an equal distance from your body, you may feel awkward which will interfer with your relaxation. Let your feet sag outwards, don't keep them vertical. This is Savasana (Corpse Pose). In the beginning, you may need a pillow under your knees and a book or foam block under your head for comfort. Don't lie on a bed since you'll fall asleep.
4. Cover yourself with a blanket to ensure you are warm. It is very difficult to relax when you are even slightly cold.
5. Close your eyes. Relax your jaw. Take a few seconds to consciously relax your muscles
6. Focus on some aspect of your breathing (the feel of the air on your nostrils or the movement of your chest or stomach). When your attention drifts away (it will every few seconds), simply bring it back. Don't get frustrated with your wandering mind. When your attention drifts off, simply bring it back again and again. The point of focusing is to avoid lying there regretting the past and worrying about the future. It really doesn't matter what you focus on but you are breathing anyway so focusing on your breath is convenient.

Inhale normally but do long, slow exhales. This stimulates the vagus nerve and activates your parasympathetic nervous system, which is responsible for counteracting the stress ("fight or flight") response of your sympathetic nervous system.

As much as you can, just lie there passively without expectation. This is harder than you'd think.

Do your relaxation practice for 10 minutes every morning and evening. If you are under a lot of stress, do it sitting down for as many minutes as you can spare before going to lunch as well. When your time is up, open your eyes, wait a few seconds, roll to one side, wait a few seconds and get up slowly. Some people get dizzy if they get to their feet too quickly.

Often it feels very satisfying to stretch at the end of your relaxation practice. While lying on the floor, stretch your arms overhead, raise your knees to your chest and stretch for a few seconds.

To develop a strong relaxation practice, do this at the same time and in the same place every day.

It is important to do your relaxation practice every day. Even 10 minutes once a day is far more effective than a two hour long session once a week

Use a timer to let you know when your relaxation practice is over. Make it very quiet (for example by keeping it far away from you and putting a pillow over it) so that when it goes off it has to beep a few times before you recognize that the time is up. In the beginning, 10 minutes may seem like an eternity but it gets better with practice. For the purpose of simple relaxation, 10 minutes twice a day is enough.

Use the bathroom before you attempt to relax. It it quite difficult to relax when your body is telling you it has other priorities.

If you carry your wallet in a back pocket, remove it before you lie down.

Many people do their relaxation practice sitting up especially if they do it at work or on the bus on their way to work. However, lying down makes the "relax" message much stronger since your heart is doing the minimum amount of work it can and all of your muscles can relax. Your heart beat slows, your blood pressure falls and your breathing slows and usually deepens. You don't have to do anything to make this happen; your body will do it automatically.

If you feel the urge to yawn, sneeze, cough or sigh, do so. If you develop an itch, wait a few seconds then, if the spot is still itching, scratch. If your arm or leg gets uncomfortable or cramps, move it. Meditators often stress never moving during meditation but for simple relaxation that is counter productive.

Wait at least 30 minutes after eating (60 minutes after a big meal) before starting your relaxation practice. On the other hand, you should not be feeling hungry when doing your relaxation practice. In either case, the process still works but not as well

Your relaxation practice won't work very well when you have caffeine or alcohol in your body. It's best to refrain from both for a few hours before doing it. The process will still work but not as well

Doing your relaxation practice after exercise or a hot shower makes it more effective. If you do a few minutes of light exercise such as walking up and down a flight of stairs a few times before you start your relaxation practice, your muscles will relax faster.

Your relaxation practice gets more effective the longer you do it. Your body learns to relax faster and takes longer to ramp back up to "stressed" after you stop relaxing. Just like exercise, if you do your relaxation practice every day, you get better at it.