who am I

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Who am I?
By Catherine Dale

I love old movies. Do you remember, "Music Man?" You know, "Professor" Harold Hill? "76 trombones in the big parade?" "Marion the librarian?" A typical Hollywood love story - boy meets girl, boy annoys girl, girl spurns boy, boy and girl have plenty of friction, etc., etc. Like I said, I love old movies.

Marion was a librarian, but she had plenty of spunk. It was just buried under mountains of dusty library books and repressed hurt. Harold Hill served as a catalyst to open the eyes and heart of our reluctant heroine. The message, though wrapped up in an elaborate package like all the Valentine chocolates ever sold, was simple. It always seems to come down to a struggle between the mind and the heart.

But let's treat this movie like any of those stories you read in the Bible, or in Hindu scripture. Let's see if it can represent something bigger. Ahhhh! The struggle between Marion and Harold could represent the struggle between the small "self" and . . . itself. The Larger Self does not struggle. It simply Is. The ego seems to have to keep butting its head up against its own emotions, reactions and physical sensations until it surrenders. Hum? Think back to Miss Marion and the movie. The mountains of dusty library books could represent the intellect. Her repressed hurt - the emotions. Sounds familiar, eh? In the movies, usually the couple has to keep having tussles and squabbles until finally there is one epiphanal moment . . . then SMOOCH! They realize they were in love all along. It's no different on the "path to enlightenment," except those tussles and epiphanies may be numerous.

What do we find when we simply let go of everything we've been clinging to and fall into God's embrace? Well, first of all, I wrote that last sentence because it sounded nice and dramatic. There is no everything to let go of. There is no embrace to fall into either. Here's the Big (or not so Big) Secret . . . We're It. With a capital "I." We're Everything - God, the Embrace, Jesus, the Choir, and the nice little old lady wearing the corsage who's playing the organ. We're The Whole Nine Yards (the Whole Cosmos, but who's counting). The epiphany is more like a quiet smile. It's kinda like hearing a joke which belongs to a punch-line your soul heard a long time ago. A punch-line which it has been trying to remember ever since. Along the way, you get closer and closer to remembering, and that's what keeps you searching. But, the Truth is, you don't need to. And, that's the joke. It's like looking for your keys all over the house, and finding them in the pocket of the pants you're wearing.

Ever noticed the pictures of Buddha and the other Saints? They've all got that smile . . . simply because they got the joke.

So, the answer to the deep question, "Who am I? is simple. A straight-man from time to time. A joker who is too practical for her own good. But, generally, someone with a pretty good sense of humour.

Catherine Dale - October 8th, 2003

www.yogainfo.ca

Who am I?
By Catherine Dale

I love old movies. Do you remember, "Music Man?" You know, "Professor" Harold Hill? "76 trombones in the big parade?" "Marion the librarian?" A typical Hollywood love story - boy meets girl, boy annoys girl, girl spurns boy, boy and girl have plenty of friction, etc., etc. Like I said, I love old movies.

Marion was a librarian, but she had plenty of spunk. It was just buried under mountains of dusty library books and repressed hurt. Harold Hill served as a catalyst to open the eyes and heart of our reluctant heroine. The message, though wrapped up in an elaborate package like all the Valentine chocolates ever sold, was simple. It always seems to come down to a struggle between the mind and the heart.

But let's treat this movie like any of those stories you read in the Bible, or in Hindu scripture. Let's see if it can represent something bigger. Ahhhh! The struggle between Marion and Harold could represent the struggle between the small "self" and . . . itself. The Larger Self does not struggle. It simply Is. The ego seems to have to keep butting its head up against its own emotions, reactions and physical sensations until it surrenders. Hum? Think back to Miss Marion and the movie. The mountains of dusty library books could represent the intellect. Her repressed hurt - the emotions. Sounds familiar, eh? In the movies, usually the couple has to keep having tussles and squabbles until finally there is one epiphanal moment . . . then SMOOCH! They realize they were in love all along. It's no different on the "path to enlightenment," except those tussles and epiphanies may be numerous.

What do we find when we simply let go of everything we've been clinging to and fall into God's embrace? Well, first of all, I wrote that last sentence because it sounded nice and dramatic. There is no everything to let go of. There is no embrace to fall into either. Here's the Big (or not so Big) Secret . . . We're It. With a capital "I." We're Everything - God, the Embrace, Jesus, the Choir, and the nice little old lady wearing the corsage who's playing the organ. We're The Whole Nine Yards (the Whole Cosmos, but who's counting). The epiphany is more like a quiet smile. It's kinda like hearing a joke which belongs to a punch-line your soul heard a long time ago. A punch-line which it has been trying to remember ever since. Along the way, you get closer and closer to remembering, and that's what keeps you searching. But, the Truth is, you don't need to. And, that's the joke. It's like looking for your keys all over the house, and finding them in the pocket of the pants you're wearing.

Ever noticed the pictures of Buddha and the other Saints? They've all got that smile . . . simply because they got the joke.

So, the answer to the deep question, "Who am I? is simple. A straight-man from time to time. A joker who is too practical for her own good. But, generally, someone with a pretty good sense of humour.

Catherine Dale - October 8th, 2003